The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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