She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
