Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
