hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
