My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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