i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
my liver is dry heaving
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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