next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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