He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
