my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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