Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Randomize
