I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
