are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
