If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
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