Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
My feet surprised me
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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