i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
