the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
