I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
