You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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