Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
