You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Man, jail baloney is awful.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
