He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
