Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
