I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Someone came in the potted fern
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
