There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
