definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
