I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
