I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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