Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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