Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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