The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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