Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
