I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
