how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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