it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
