How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
