I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
