Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
