I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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