There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize
