last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
