it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I puked a lego.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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