If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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