He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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