I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
