I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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