where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
