oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
