If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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