doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
