This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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